Waiting for Me
by Starzki
Summary: When I saw Kaname sitting outside of the door to my apartment, I thought she was a hallucination. Takes place during and after the final scene of The Wind Blows at Home arc. S/K.


Disclaimer: The characters of _Full Metal Panic!_ do not belong to me and I am not profiting by writing these stories.

Author's Note: This is absolutely my favorite scene from the anime series. So little is said, yet so much is felt that I just wanted to dive into the scene and see where it took me. This fic is the finished product.

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Waiting for Me

By Starzki

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I was so tired by the time I got back to Japan that my eyes were starting to cross. So when I saw Kaname sitting outside of the door to my apartment, I thought she was a hallucination. When I blinked a few times and she was still there, I realized that I wasn't imagining her.

Staring at her, I heard Gray's voice in my head asking me if I had someone in Japan waiting for me. I had said no. I had said maybe. My heart swelled to know that I did.

Kaname was sleeping on my doorstep. That she was here after these past brutally hard days felt incredibly important, but I was too exhausted to try to understand _why_ it felt so significant.

Looking back, I think it was right at that moment that I realized that she was more than a mission objective to me. I think I realized that she might even be more than a friend.

I regarded her as I bent to sit next to her. Kaname's long hair had fallen to the side, exposing the right side of her neck. She was so vulnerable that I felt instantly protective of her. How stunning she really is in person always surprises me after I have been away from her for more than a few days. I tend to think I exaggerate her beauty in my mind, but each time I come back, I realize that she is so much more than I remember. That night, I found myself wanting to touch her skin and press my mouth to that curve of her neck. I refused to let my mind further wander as I sat next to her.

I wasn't sure what her reaction would be when I woke her. Part of me thought she would be annoyed or mad that I had kept her waiting. I feared that she would wake up angry and yelling and that I would shatter under her onslaught.

She surprised me by being gentle and sleepy as she curled into me. I felt the weight of her head on my shoulder. Kaname asked me to say something. I said the only thing I could think of whenever she asked me something that that was too hard to answer, "No problem." I didn't have the words to try to explain where I had been or what had happened. Yet even though I wouldn't have dreamt of unburdening myself, my guilt, on her, it still felt like she was radiating encouragement from my side.

As my chin hit my chest, I realized that I was nodding off and in real danger of falling asleep here with Kaname on my doorstep. Calling in whatever reserves of energy I had left, I stood. Kaname also looked like she was struggling to open her eyes. She was never one who could pop awake, even at the best of times.

This wouldn't do. It felt too dangerous to send her back to her apartment when she was so defenseless. There also was no way that I had enough energy to escort her. At least, this was what I told myself as I made the decision that she would be staying with me tonight.

I unlocked the door and helped her to her feet. She began swaying immediately, clutching at a bag of peanuts and a keychain. Kaname mumbled about them being my souvenirs and I felt my heart in my throat at the realization that she had been thinking of me, had missed me while I was gone.

I opened the door and placed her gifts on the floor just inside, promising myself that I'd pick them up first thing in the morning. I kicked off my shoes and Kaname stumblingly shuffled out of hers, nearly losing her balance.

Feeling like I had an internal clock that was just minutes from ticking down to the time I would just pass out wherever I was standing, I knew I had to get to bed as soon as possible. Therefore, to save time, I scooped up Kaname, one arm around her shoulders and the other under her knees. She gave a small sound of surprise, but brought her arms up around my neck and tucked her head under my chin.

She was so warm and felt so nice that despite my exhaustion, I took my time walking to the bedroom. I had only recently been carrying a warhead away from a scene of carnage. I had felt so empty.

Now, I was carrying a living person, something infinitely more precious. The empty feeling was long gone, replaced with... Caring? Affection? I was too tired to parse the thought. All I knew is that I wasn't alone and that it felt pleasant. It felt like a kind of salvation after these awful days.

I put Kaname down and had her sit on the edge of the cot. She blinked lazily around at the room. My cot was more comfortable and slightly larger than the standard issue, but still had only one pillow. Kaname grabbed it for herself and stretched out on her left side and was breathing evenly in a manner of seconds. I couldn't help but smile at her greediness as I took off my belt and socks.

The cot creaked as I, too, went to lay down on my left side behind Kaname. I could feel the darkness of unconsciousness creeping through me. I closed my eyes on the scene of Kaname's hair swept away from that perfect curve of her neck as I sank into sleep.

That night, instead of dreaming of craggy, blood-spattered mountains, I dreamt of rolling, soft white sand dunes that led to a calm azure sea.

-x-

That I could still feel Kaname's presence as I slept explained why I wasn't surprised or alarmed when I felt the bed shift early the next morning. I guessed that we had been sleeping for about four hours, but my eyes stubbornly wouldn't open so that I could confirm the first rays of sunlight through the window.

I continued dozing as Kaname found her way to the bathroom, then to my front door. I thought she was leaving until I heard her footsteps in the bedroom once again.

"I put your souvenirs on the table in the kitchen," she whispered. I managed a grunt of acknowledgement but my eyes remained shut.

"Jeeze," she mused. "You must be really tired." I could hear the smile in her voice. Then she did something unexpected. I felt her smoothing my hair back away from my face. It felt so enjoyable and comforting that I almost fell right back to sleep.

"Thank you, Sousuke. This was nice," she whispered so quietly that I almost couldn't catch it. Then she spoke a little louder, "I'll be fine on my way home."

I finally worked my eyelids open to watch her leave my room. "Thank you, Chidori," I said, my voice husky and dry.

She paused. "Hmm," she answered. Then she left.

I pulled the pillow that still had the lingering scent of her under my head and fell back asleep. I once again dreamt of white beaches by the impossibly blue sea.

END.

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><p>AN2: Any notes on my writing this fic are available at my livejournal page with the username of starzki (link available on my profile page).<p>

AN3: Scribefigaro has made an amazing _Full Metal Panic_ AMV. I've provided a link to it on my profile page to check it out!

AN4: Your thoughts and reviews are always appreciated so tell me what you thought!


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